Amber - To Pee or Not to Pee - PART 2

Yesterday was my 3 month anniversary. As I wrote about yesterday, it is important to challenge yourself and try something new. So, I had to pee... again. I thought I was doing well. I went at 2:30 pm. I went again at 5:00 pm. I'm in the 6 pm class, and I make it through the standing series. We lay down and all of a sudden it hits again. I think that I can make it like I did before. We roll over. I pretty much did nothing because it was just pressure. Finally I decide I can't take it any more and stand up to leave. I have decided that Reggie must read this blog because he instantly said to me... "Are you leaving MY class?" It's like he knew that it really bothered me to leave and wanted to just challenge me one more time to make sure I was making the right decision. I left. I came back in a moment later. I only missed one asana, but I felt like I was walking into the class for the first time at the half-tortoise. I was so disoriented. I can now advise firmly against leaving... even if you have to pee.

On another note, yesterday was great. Previously, I didn't appreciate Reggie's teaching style. I realized that I didn't appreciate him because he doesn't let me be lazy. He guided me through the triangle pose so I went deeper and stronger. When I got out of it, I had a sense of real accomplishment. It is amazing how our bodies work. Just when I think I have done all I can do, I went further. I did more. Sometimes we need someone to encourage us to do what we are capable of. At first you may get angry... but at the end you realize how great they really are.

Just as a small example, I will never forget the day my parents wanted me to go to Lurray Caverns with them. I was 15 or 16 years old. I had other plans in mind that day. I believe I had a boyfriend or someone else that I wanted to spend my day with. So I through a temper tantrum just like any other 15 year old girl would do. I crossed my arms and pouted that day. I was absolutely not interested in anything. I can stand here as a nearly 30 year old and tell you that I saw some of the most beautiful things that day. In my stubborn way I have never thanked my parents.

Just remember that people don't push you to do something because they want to be mean. They do it because they see something inside you that tells them you deserve more and can do more. My parents knew that I would appreciate what I saw that day. Reggie knows that I can do more in my practice than my mind thinks it can. In my stubborn way... this is my thanks.

Amber - Bikram, One day at a time, 90 days later

I find it hard to believe that 3 months ago today my life changes started to begin. In some ways three months seems like a long time, but three months in nearly 30 years of life, is really just a small percentage of time. It's amazing to me how small decisions in life have a domino affect in just about everything you do. For me, it's changed friendships - some stronger, some now weaker. It's changed my level of appreciation for things. It's helped my patience, although some days I have to question that still.

I was folding laundry yesterday when I heard Joel Osteen come on TV. For those of you who don't know who he is, Joel is a Evangelist. While I do have faith, I am normally against this style of preaching. However, yesterday morning his message was one that I was able to connect with more than ever. He talked about God having a huge plan for us, but often we stick to a narrow path. We become creatures of habit. We only socialize with those of similar interests. We pre-judge opportunities to do something. We are quick to say, "I won't like that," before ever trying. He talked about small things like that path that he runs every day is the same. One day, he decided to turn the other way. It was an eye-opening experience, literally. He talked about getting out of the comfort zone and trying new things. He told story after story personifying his message.

Three months ago today, I went out of my comfort zone and so many things are changing. For me, it was Bikram yoga, no drinking, and no smoking. It was changing my lifestyle. Making my moments with people true memories and conversations. It's about getting beyond the surface and getting to know myself in the process. I believe that things happen in our lives for a reason. People enter and exit. Opportunities come and go. It is truly about the old Latin saying "Carpe Diem." I don't know what is in store tomorrow, but I do know that my decisions today will impact tomorrow. I am thankful I have let go of my fears of change because the world it has opened for me is amazing.

I would imagine that most people that walk into Bikram yoga for the first time, don't realize the impact it will make on them if they let it. I had no idea the first time I went in there that it would affect me the way it has. I had no idea when I signed up for that first month that it was going to become a lifestyle. I went in to work out and hopefully drop some weight. I read the testimonials on Bikramyoga.com. So one day at a time, Bikram yoga has changed my life.

Joel Osteen ended his sermon challenging everyone to try something new, to go a different way, to get uncomfortable. What will you do?

Amber - To Pee or Not to Pee, that is the question

As you may guess from the title, I ran into a small problem yesterday. Traffic is always a pleasure in Northern Virginia. Rt. 28 was backed up as normal. Only yesterday I left about 5 minutes late to make the 6 pm class. To make up for the back up, I decided to try some back roads. Those of you that know me, know that I am queen of the back road. Well, I hit every light on my back roads. I got to class 5 minutes late. I changed and got into class just as they were starting the half-moon. I jumped right in. Then it dawned on me at the beginning of this 90 minute class... I have not used the restroom since 7 am. Then those thoughts began to consume me. I was being haunted by thoughts of rivers and waterfalls. I could see Ashley's message in her blog dancing in front of me saying "Whatever you do - don't leave the room." So I made it through the standing series. The standing separate leg, head to knee pose was a bit of a challenge. Actually anything that you have to suck in your stomach was a challenge. Oh that was every pose, in case you were wondering... On to the floor series... the first asana on the floor is where you lay on your back and bring up one knee to compress the ascending colon. Then you bring up the next knee for the descending colon. Finally you bring up both knees so you're like a ball to massage the transverse colon. You can call it colon all you want - but to a full bladder - it was like a water balloon about to pop! do not leave the room... do not leave the room... Next we roll over on to our stomachs - or protruding bladder - whichever you would like to call it. This is the spine strengthening series. Lift one leg, lift the other legs, lift both legs, lift your arms and legs so you are just on your belly, grab both your feet and roll forward... waterfall.... river... do not leave the room... Now I am within 15 minutes of class ending. I can't possibly leave the room now. So I just took it easy the last 15 minutes of class. I got through the final breathing exercise and I grabbed my things and darted out of the class.

I have one moral for this post - ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS, pee before class.

Amber - Bikram is my Summer

It's funny now when I sit down and write, I almost have to re-read everything I've written just to make sure I don't retell the same stories. By re-reading what I write, I am just confirming just how far I've come. I've been in this slump. I think you, the reader, have probably felt that. It has been emotional and physical. It is in this moment I'm so thankful I started documenting this journey so close to the beginning. I have been able to find inspiration within myself to continue doing what I had set out to do.

Change can be something people consciously do, or it can be something that progressively happens without intent. It is like the seasons. We know that here in northern Virginia we will have all four seasons. It is a slow progressive change. I am relating my state to Spring. Some days are like summer, but others are like Winter. Some days are full of sunshine, while others are cold and rainy. I think we need these set backs to continue to move forward. Like anything, it is all how you deal with what is presented. I'm not sure if I have been handling my changes in the best way. Luckily I have good friends that are patient with this progression and they understand that this isn't easy for me either.

I've noticed that I have had more trouble getting up for the morning classes. I wonder if it partially has something to do with the inconsistency of my schedule. Ideally I would be able to take a 5:30/6 am class every day. Today was an amazing. I woke up right on time. Took the dogs for my normal walk. I had laid out everything last night. So I changed and realized I was super early. I watched about 15 minutes of Cops before I left to go to class. I arrived and got set up. It was nice to be in a quiet room. (I had gone to another studio over the weekend, and people were talking before and right after the class. VERY DISTRACTING!) When class began, I noticed I was more relaxed than normal. I started in the mindset to have a very strong practice. I held the standing bow the entire time the first set. I've done that before, but not consistently. During the floor series, my full locust pose I felt that I really went for it. I gave 100% right up until the end of class. It was very rewarding to know that in that class, I did the best I could for today. I can only hope that tomorrow I will at least meet or exceed today. I remember just a few months ago walking into my first class. I was only able to start about 50% of the postures. Now I am doing them!

As we approach my favorite season of the year, I will continue to work my way out of the slump I'm in. I ask you to challenge me. Remind me of how good I feel when I go. On those bad days, remind me that yoga, NOT Ben & Jerry's is the answer. Soon enough, we'll all be dancing in the sun!

Amber - Just a little Patience...

I started my combination workout regimen yesterday. I got home from work just before 6. Took the dogs on a short walk. I watched an episode of 90210 - which I realized I had been to the Greek where Kelly celebrated her 21st birthday! It was pretty nice to have an hour to unwind with the dogs and watch my favorite reruns. Then I got changed and walked to the little fitness center in my apartment complex. I worked out on the treadmill for a little over 20 minutes. I even worked my way up to a jog for a few minutes. I went to do the stationary bike, but that is dreadfully boring and I couldn't even people watch. It was too far away from the windows. I can say I don't like this workout as much as Bikram. I don't sweat as much. I enjoy the challenge of having people around me and me feeling like I can't get away with being lazy. I don't feel like I get the same workout on the treadmill.

I do have one major accomplishment to report. The past 3 times I have been to class, I have moved to the next step of camel. If you remember it made me sick to just put my head back. Well, on Saturday I was able to reach back and grab both feet to go into a full back bend. Thinking it was a fluke Saturday, I went again that afternoon. I did it again! So, on to this morning... It happened a 3rd time. It must not be a fluke.

I have continuously improved as time moves on. I can only imagine this never ends. The body is designed to be able to do miraculous things. Over time anything is possible. At the end of the day - I am learning patience.

Amber - The results are in!

Today was the final weigh-in at work. I can say, I'm not very happy with my results. At one point I was up to 21 lbs lost and this morning I was only at 16 lbs lost. With that I have a few ways to look at it. I could throw in the towel and accept nothing works for me. I can keep trying and assume that the fluctuation in weight was actually building muscle. I can change my workout routine to incorporate a variety of things.

I love Bikram. I know that my body is changing. I know that my mind is growing. I have more strength then I remember ever having. I am finding the flexibility I once had as a dancer. I will not change that. I will keep to a 5 day per week Bikram class schedule. I am going to add to that 2-3 days a week of a strict cardio routine. Walking, running, something. I need to shed this fat. It's in my way!

Although I am not happy with my final weigh-in results, I know it is a great accomplishment. I have lost and kept off 1 lb per week. That is good steady weight loss. That is the kind of weight loss that is permanent and shows a change in lifestyle - not the results of a fad diet.

Thank you for continuing to support me and I look for any advice you may have!