Amber - Challenge of Change

I want to begin this saying that Bikram, after only one week, has become a lifestyle. If I don't go in a day, which I've only done once, I feel like something is missing. It is a life changing lifestyle. I can't imagine smoking before class and getting through it. This makes it easier to quit. I definitely can't imagine drinking before class. I would probably pass out. I'm sure people do both - but can you really get the benefits? Ashley gave me one piece of advice. She said - listen to what your body craves. When your brain and your body have a conflict of cravings, go with your body. It will tell you what it needs. I don't think I've ever eaten healthier and I've been so satisfied. That's not to say the cake doesn't look good or that hot steaming loaf of bread with the oil and spices doesn't look good... but that's just it - my body wasn't craving those, just my brain.

I noticed washing my face has been a bit different. After I turn into a human water fountain for about 90 minutes, there really isn't anything dirty about me. I shower immediately when I get home. I wash my face in the shower. I get out and use an astringent just like I've always done. But now, the cotton is clean when I use the astringent. It used to remove that last bit of dirt still stuck in my face. I've been doing this for years so it's not like all of a sudden I have no more dirt. I've just released all of the physical toxins from my body in class. That is the one piece of hard proof I can offer you after only a week.

Those love handles in my back - well, they are certainly smoothing out! Pretty soon when they say "See your ribs in the mirror" - I may actually do that! I don't know if it's possible, but I think my neck is getting longer. I can only imagine it is possible with all of the spine stretching we do.

During class it is so quiet. No one talks. Everyone just concentrates. I was initially very self conscience coming to this class. The truth is, if you look at what someone else is doing and what they look like, you will mess up and lose balance. At times it feels as if you are the only one in that room. Just when you don't think you can't do any more - you do. I'm not sure it's always visible that I'm doing more - but I feel it.

Last night during the opening series of warm ups - in my opinion some of the most difficult to maintain - I was able to keep my arms up parallel to the ground the whole time. To do the math that is about 5 minutes. Maybe a bit more if you include the second set. The first few my shoulders burned so much I couldn't do it. I also noticed that in the half moon, my arms stayed at my ears and my palms did go together. Maybe I had achieved that in the last class - but I didn't notice. I'm not sure that I went any deeper into the posture, I just did it correctly. Oh and speaking of the half moon... When leaning back - I did see the back wall!

The one major thing I can't seem to get past is near the end of the standing series my ankles kill. I hope this will improve with strength. I know I'm not swollen. If anything I've lost weight in my feet because the heels I wore yesterday, normally cut into the top of my foot - but they were comfortable ALL day!

This may sound minor to you the reader... but every little improvement I make only leads to greater physical improvement, greater mental improvement, and an overall better quality of life. Change takes time. It takes dedication. I can not expect to be that girl I was when I was 18 in a week. I can expect to see the changes starting to happen. I believe that I will be better than that 18 year old I once was. I will be more healthy. I will have a greater outlook on life. I will have done it on my own and faced the challenge of change.